I am not a camper.
Yes, yes, I know. I live in BC! I should be adorned in head to toe North Face, traveling in a canoe towards a secluded island for camping adventures every weekend.
But I’m not.
Because I don’t like camping.
You’re not going to change me.
Stop trying to make me something I’m not.
With that said, I do LOVE being outside. I merely have boundaries with the outdoors. I feel like boundaries are healthy and show how mature I am.
Criteria for an “Ashley Outdoors Excursion”:
- No “packing” required. I do not have kids yet, therefore I do not want to be schlepping bags full of other peoples snacks and living supplies around.
- No encounters with wild animals larger than maybe a raccoon. I want my interactions with animals in the outdoors to look like Snow White is going on a casual stroll, not like Leo in The Revenant
- All potty incidents happen in an actual potty.
I don’t feel like I’m asking for the world.
If you’re reading this and thinking, “Now that’s the kinda gal I can get on board with,” then this is the list for you.
Here are three of my favourite local excursions that are unlikely to kill me:
When I first visited Quarry Rock I was very mad. Why you ask? Because it was listed as an “easy hike” in an article entitled, “5 Easy Hikes for Lazy People in Vancouver.” I read that and thought, “Sweet. I’ll develop a lovely glint of sweat but not so much sweat that I smell bad.” So I went. I think I said, “Easy hike for lazy people my foot!” at least 5 times on the way up. It was a lot more “hike-y” than I thought it would be. However, with that said, after the initial surprise that I was hiking , I did really enjoy Quarry Rock. The view at the top is beautiful, you’ll sweat, you’ll get a great laugh at the girls who clearly read the same article as me and showed up in high heels, and you can reward all your hard work at the end with the best donuts you’ll ever have in your life. If that isn’t enough reason to hike, I don’t know what is.
Light House Park
I went to Light House Park a week or so after I went to Quarry Rock. It felt almost too easy after that. I just can’t be pleased. Located in West Vancouver, Light House Park has several scenic, easy trails, with lovely views. No donuts though.
A beautiful (easy) trail tucked in Golden Ears Provincial Park. The whole trail is a little under 3km and follows along Gold Creek all the way to the falls. There are beautiful views of the mountains, a rocky beach about half way through that’s perfect for a refreshing sit-down, and at the end you’re rewarded with the beauty of the falls. Giddy and I like to climb around the side of the trail and sit on the rocks near the falls. For me it’s a climb. For the average person it’s probably just an elevated walk.
So there it is, a simple guide on how I survive the wilderness. Happy Monday. And you’re welcome.